The Best Bad Quarterback Ever

Sports movies tend to be hit or miss these days. For every Raging Bull there always seems to be a Caddyshack II. For every Rudy there is always a Major League: Back to the Minors. Fine fine, I didn't see Raging Bull. But I'm inclined to think that half the people who claim what a great movie it is are like me: they don't want to have that awkward five minute conversation with an elder who claims Raging Bull is the greatest piece of cinema ever created. I'd rather just take your word for it, throw in a quick, "Oh yeah, DeNiro is phenomenal," and carry on with my day. So that's normally what I do when it's brought up. That said, someone reading this will most likely tell me that I HAVE to see it the next time we come in verbal or textual contact. I guess my covers blown. Oh well, I guess there are also worse things I can do with two hours of my day.

Every once in a while though, there is a sports movie that is simply put, awesome. Take Major League for example. After you get over your initial shock that I am talking about Major League (I know it's shocking), think about if you really like Charlie Sheen. Most of you will probably think, "He is insanely hilarious in life." He is, no argument there. But when looking at Major League, most people will look at it as simply a comedy and overlook the true story of how a ragtag bunch of athletes came together for a common goal, with Sheen giving a great performance. Oh, and also Pedro Cerrano, who later went on to tell us all how we are in good hands with Allstate.  Another sports movie that tells a great story, yet doesn't have that R-rated humor to fall back on, is Remember the Titans.

Right about now you may be thinking, "make your point dummy, my food is burning." Relax it's coming. Aside from having what I think is the greatest soundtrack in movie history, Remember the Titans brings every element of being a human into play. In short, it tells the story of how cultural differences are put aside to achieve a common goal. Take notes America. Remember the Titans reels off dramatic one liners as well as JFK, Lincoln, and FDR put together. Yeah, I'm reaching. But every once in a while, you have to reach, especially in a blog. One line sticks out to me because it sums up so many different life situations and gives perspective on how to look at them. It's a scene in a hospital: that scene where Gary is laying in his hospital bed paralyzed, and Coach Yost tells him that, "it's a time for prayer," to which Gary so calmly responds, "Coach...I'm hurt...I ain't dead." How perfect is that line? Well just ask Brady Hoke, cause that's what he inherited in Ann Arbor nearly two years ago: a program that was hurt, but not dead. And like Coach Yost and Coach Boone, lucky for Coach Hoke he had a quarterback with some wacky hair to save the day.

Denard Robinson stiff arming Manti Te'o. photo credit: maizenbluenation.com

You may not think much of Denard Robinson. You may think he's overhyped, can't throw, and should never have been the quarterback for Michigan. You may be right. He is a little over hyped, he definitely can't throw, and he probably shouldn't ever have been under center (well, in the shotgun at least) for Michigan. And thank God he was. Just about five years ago, Michigan introduced its new head coach, a strapping young offensive genius heading north from "almost heaven, West Virginia." It's only fitting that as I use that John Denver line, I think about John Denver's performance in the movie Oh God! Be honest, that's what you said to yourslf when Michigan hired Rodriguez, don't lie. You wanted Les Miles. I wanted Les Miles. Hell, Rich Rodriguez may have even wanted Les Miles, looking back on the situation. I'm going to blame Kirk Herbstreit for reporting it early and sabotaging Michigan's attempt to bring a proud son home (come on, I mentioned Jack Kennedy earlier--you knew I was going to bring in a conspiracy). Instead Michigan fans got Rodriguez. The first year was a disaster. The only person who didn't play quarterback for Michigan that year was Rodriguez himself. Two names for you: Steven Threet and Nick Sheridan. If I were to get up in front of a crowd of people and say "yikes" when referring to those two, I would fully expect a Nobel Peace Prize. They were horrible. They were awful. Yes Shaq, they were horr-awful. I never thought I'd use that term unless I, like Shaq, was referring to Craig Sager's wardrobe, but it fits. But by year two, everything was better. In Tate we trust...haha.

Forcier was a diva, whose career went south faster than Rodriguez's. He beat Notre Dame and was anointed as Michigan's next leader. Everyone beat Notre Dame those days. Jimmy Clausen was their quarterback, how could you lose? To think that Forcier was at one time mentioned in the same sentence as Brady or Griese makes me cringe. You can think to yourself that he wasn't, but he was, partly because Michigan fans (myself included) wanted any bridge to the "glory years." Little did they (and I) know that their bridge was sitting on the sidelines with his shoes untied.

Those who stay will be champions. Immortal words to anyone who has ever loved Michigan. How can they not be? For Christ's sake, the building is called Schembechler Hall people. The man is a legend. Even if you despise Michigan, you respect Bo. You wanted to cry when he died. I did cry when he died. And as I ponder what Bo would say to Denard Robinson, the unlikeliest of faces for a program that needed one desperately, I can't help but think it would go something like, "Well done, son. Well done."

What else can you say to Robinson? His scrutinization-per-capita amongst Michiganians is second only to the former Lions GM-who-must-not-be-named. Every time Robinson does something well, Michigan fans are quick to point out that Robinson should still be considered a Heisman candidate. And as soon as he throws a pick that hits Manti Te'o right in the numbers, fans are calling for John Navarre. He's twenty-two people. He may be the most scrutinized college football player in the last thirty years, going back to Marcus Dupree (look him up, it's worth it). And as Robinson's tenure comes to an end for the Maize and Blue, if I had the opportunity to say something to him, I'd probably say, "Well done, son. Well done."

Without Robinson, Michigan probably doesn't have the one decent season it had under Rodriguez. The product you see on the field now would not be nearly as good. And they most definitely do not go to the Sugar Bowl (and win) last year. Someone somewhere is reading this and saying to themselves, "you're wrong, Devin Gardner would have been just fine, probably even better." Think hard. Devin Gardner has played quarterback for Michigan at points over the last couple of years. And he has looked a lot more like Nick Sheridan than Denard Robinson, minus of course the last three weeks. Robinson never tried to fool you. You knew what you were going to get with him. He was going to make mistakes in the passing game, striking gold every once in a while. He was going to burn you in the running game. He was going to win the non-conference Heisman trophy. And he was going to be respectful, humble, and fiery afterwards.

What three characteristics better define a leader? I couldn't think of any either. He is a winner who (along with his head coach) has led the revival of the proudest football University in this country. Sorry Irish fans, Michigan has still got you on wins. Robinson may never be mentioned with the all-time greats at Michigan. That's fair. He isn't one of the all-time greats. But without him, Michigan football isn't where it is today. Think about that next time he makes a mistake and you call for his head. Go blue.